The Church of Hellcake

The Great Void

The beginning of our journey <cue drifting music> starts with a special place called The Great Void. The most interesting thing about this place is it contains an infinite number of things, such as gods, devils, unicorns, rainbow bridges, magical-what-nots, and mysterious-do-littles. But... as the name suggests, it may also be completely empty.

The Great Void is a term defined here to collectively represent all that is unfalsifiable to us, with a strong emphasis on magic. For those who do not know, below are a couple definitions of "falsifiability".

Falsifiability - A statement, hypothesis, or theory has falsifiability (or is falsifiable) if it can be proven false by contradicting it with a basic statement or observation. For example, the claim "all swans are white" is falsifiable since the basic statement, "In 1697, during the Dutch explorer Willem de Vlamingh expedition, there were black swans on the shore of the Swan River in Australia" contradicts it. The concept is also known by the terms refutable and refutability."

Wikipedia.com Falsifiability

Falsifiability is the capacity for some proposition, statement, theory or hypothesis to be proven wrong. That capacity is an essential component of the scientific method and hypothesis testing. In a scientific context, falsifiability is sometimes considered synonymous with testability."

WhatIs.TechTarget.com Falsifiability

Let me introduce you to one example of such unfalsifiable entities: The Incredibly Invisible Flying Pigs. Don't laugh. They are philosophically powerful creatures shrouded in mystery. These beings are completely invisible to all things. They do not interact with light or matter, or anything else. And so, there is nothing a human or any other sentient being can do, no experiment they can perform, no test they can create, to falsify the existence of these incredibly invisible flying pigs. Not even your god(s), if you have one, can see them. Unless that god is Nim, because he is The God of Gods and sees all (more on that later).

Danger Will Robinson, Danger!

But not everything necessarily remains unfalsifiable. Sometimes, things have to be moved back into The Great Void, to keep them safe from snakes and skeptics. The 7 days of creation as told in The Book of Genesis, is clearly not how The Universe was made. However, one may invent fixes for this. They can simply dodge the bullet and say "Oh, it wasn't literal". Or, they can go further and say "God only made the The Universe appear as if it were old", as some Christians have suggested (see: omphalos hypothesis). You could even say "A powerful being named Burblegabber came in after that and remade The Universe to look differently than one would expect if it were true to confound us", and that too would be unfalsifiable.

You could sit down all day, thinking of hundreds of unfalsifiable explanations for all sorts of things. You could spend the rest of your life creating thousands upon thousands of unfalsifiable gods, explanations, religions, or various types of supernatural flying pigs. The Great Void is infinite. There are an infinite amount of explanations for the world that cannot be falsified.

All of the sudden... the phrase "you can't disprove it" seems to lose all meaning doesn't it? If you listen closely during a full Moon, you can hear these 4 magical words echoeing for all eternity through infinite hallways, that may or may not exist.

Ashes To Ashes

Here is one more example of an unfalsifiable belief, that was likely posted on the Internet by Satan to trick you into going to Hell.

Last Thursdayism (alternately Last Tuesdayism! or Last Wednesdayism) is the idea that the universe was created last Thursday, but with the physical appearance of being billions of years old. It's also a counter to the creationism theory. Under Last Thursdayism, books, fossils, light already on the way from distant stars, and literally everything (including your memories of the time before last Thursday) were all formed at the time of creation (last Thursday) in a state such that they appear much older.

RationalWiki.org Last Thursdayism

This of course is similar to the omphalos hypothesis mentioned before, except nobody invited God. You may be realizing something rather paradoxical sounding right now, the unfalsifiable can be utilized to suppport and contradict any god, or any belief for that matter. Invoking it is philosophical nuclear war. Mutally assured destruction (M.A.D.).

For instance, if I walk up to someone and shot them in the face 36 times infront of hundreds of eye-witnesses, I can simply say a demon only implanted those memories in those witnesses, or that a demon created a mass illusion. I could also say I was possesed by a demon at the time, or that God told me to do it. So many colorful fruits to choose from.

Someone else could play the same game of invoking unfalsifiable claims, but use them to oppose my own unfalsifiable claim. They could claim they spoke to God and God told them that he never told me too, or they could claim that demon possession leaves a supernatural fingerprint and they did not detect any such mark.

This concept is precisely why it's so easy for human beings to come up with all sorts of explanations for things. As long as it sounds true or intuitive, and has shiny anecdotes backing it up, then it's quite easy to sell. And humans have been selling these kind of explanations in multitudes for thousands of years. Science, of course, was a huge depature in this way of thinking.

What Does It All Mean?

Beyond the scope of science, and the reach of attainable knowledge, is a dark place that can never be illuminated, where gods, angels, demons, goblins, ghosts, Heaven, and Hell thrive. The Church of Nim inhabits these deep nether regions beyond normal perception. But unlike religious law and fantasy, it does not futilely fight to stand in the spotlight of absolute truth.

Instead, it willingly accepts and occupies the vast and dark unknown regions that shroud the speck of light we call knowledge. This small dot of awareness, which barely pricks the boundless and unknowable darkness, that religions hopelessly try to illuminate with faith and testimony, is seen for what it really is. The Church of Nim accepts this epistemological darkness and makes use of it, but never tries to defeat it.

That being said, I have confirmed this to be the true-ist church of them all.